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Posts Tagged ‘fucking’

  1. Love me for

    February 11, 2010 by Mathew Ferguson

    You love me for my sincerity, honesty and good moral values.
    I wish you loved me for my huge cock and dirty fucking.

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    Rating: 4.3/10 (6 votes cast)

  2. Scene

    September 24, 2009 by Mathew Ferguson

    A scene witnessed many times.
    A girl I’ve fucked and a girl I’m going to fuck shake hands and I hear “Hi, I’m Mat’s girlfriend.”

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    Rating: 6.0/10 (6 votes cast)

  3. Football

    August 19, 2009 by Mathew Ferguson

    Fucking Australia and all the fucking obsession with fucking sport!
    “Some football player has sustained a papercut and is in doubt for this weekend, also three billion people have died from an unknown virus, BUT AGAIN, SOME FOOTBALL PLAYER HAS SUSTAINED A PAPERCUT!”

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    Rating: 3.0/10 (2 votes cast)

  4. Brands

    August 14, 2009 by Mathew Ferguson

    Every single day I come to work and hear you talk about marketing and brands and building the brand I wish for a virus to escape a Russian lab and spread across the world, wiping out all humanity.
    I want you to be one of the last people to die so you can really appreciate that building the brand really is NOT FUCKING IMPORTANT!

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    Rating: 2.3/10 (3 votes cast)

  5. Fucking

    August 12, 2009 by Mathew Ferguson

    There were two great things about all the fucking we did.
    The first was that it left no time for serious relationship talk and the second was, well, the fucking.

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    Rating: 8.3/10 (3 votes cast)

  6. Losers

    August 10, 2009 by Mathew Ferguson

    Losers breed because women have low standards.
    C’mon girls – fuck higher up the social hierarchy and breed those motherfuckers out!

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    Rating: 7.8/10 (4 votes cast)

  7. Saying you’re a writer

    August 8, 2009 by Mathew Ferguson

    Being a writer never got anyone a roll in the hay.
    Saying you’re a writer guarantees you’ll get your brains fucked out.

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    Rating: 7.5/10 (2 votes cast)